Rambling on a Wednesday morning

I’ve never read Sam Shepard http://www.sam-shepard.com  before. I’ve seen his plays and movies, but never sat down to read any of his writing. I am almost done with Spy of the First personand it is over whelming. WOW!!!

The cover of the book is striking. I look at the credits and it’s a photographer that has been around for a while, but I recently discovered her though a podcast. Her name is Graciela Inturbide. http://www.gracielaiturbide.org/en/ http://www.gracielaiturbide.org/en/
I love her work. I want to say she shoots only in black and white.I love black and white photography. That used to be my first love. Then I discovered printing.

I don’t love a technique or specialty in art anymore. Why? Burnt out from working 15 years in the same place.

My friend’s daughter moved back home to the bay area because she couldn’t find a job in Los Angeles or New York. (Remember 9-11?) I stayed in that job for many years. Fearful and afraid in the beginning that I couldn’t survive and would have to leave the bay area.   I didn’t want to leave and would pay the price working in the same place for years. Thank God there were some really nice people there, otherwise I would have never made it.

How do I feel now that I am out of that job after all those years? Who gives a shit? Come what may. I am burnt and done being fearful and scared of bullshit. Housing is and still is the big issue in the Bay Area.. Most the landlords I had living here SUCKED. Only one man was nice. He didn’t keep up the building, but at least he was a human being. The rest were capitalist greedy pigs.

Thus, since I have quit that job. I am now looking for my creative stream again. I had it. Can you loose it? Does it come back? I think it does, but in a different capacity.

I feel like I’m on the verge of finding that inspirational spark. It does spark, but no smoke or fire yet.

I used to live for photography. I would wake up and ask myself, what am I going to shoot today? Random stuff, planned portraits? One of my favorite activities was to take a friend with a few props and shoot them as many angles as possible. Those were the days with film and  you tried to make every frame count.

With digital photo I can shoot every angle up and down, left and right. Delete the photo if it doesn’t feel right. Bingo! How easy! Follow me on Instagram: OceanFishes3

However, I haven’t printed anything in years, not like the darkroom days. I love having control over the image.  I hate sending photos to commercial labs. But what choice is there, unless one spends serious cash to print at home? I don’t really like jet ink prints on photo paper. They fade after time. But…maybe in the end that’s ok, as we all fade away. “Lord I’m gonna fade away…”Rolling Stones

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